The Lexicographer's Rules

A lost wilderness. “Squirrels are highly intelligent, agile enough to tightrope-walk along telephone wires, and poor conductors of electricity. Somehow they have realised that by biting through to the bare wires and short-circuiting the 50 volts that run through them into their own bodies, they can heat themselves up. In this way, Roger said, each squirrel becomes a sort of low-voltage electric blanket—and will sit up on the wires with a stoned smile for hours.”

Gillette man’s custom shifter knobs are sent to customers around the world. "A man from Idaho once sent Roosa a film canister containing then-live ticks that he had pulled off his dog along with several of his own wisdom teeth that a doctor had extracted. He wanted the teeth to be placed in the center of the knob with the ticks surrounding them on various levels—. Other items that Roosa has put in shifter knobs have varied—a squirrel skull, car brand logos and even some ballet slippers for his grown daughter who, as a child, loved to dance."

Quoted here simply because I like the first line. So-Called Captain America Faces Drug, Battery Charges. "A doctor carrying a burrito and dressed as the comic book hero was arrested after allegedly grabbing a woman inappropriately at a bar and fighting with her boyfriend.…He later tried to flush marijuana he had likely hidden in his costume down a toilet at a police station, a police spokeswoman said."

Someone whose name I believe is Jenny writes in the blog A Finely Crafted Run-on Sentence about the use of English slang among Ugandan students, as much of an issue there where English shares mouths with myriad other languages as it is in the United States where English dominates:

English is like any form of communication, and the speaker or writer has to know which version to use for which audience. However, the frequency with which the language of the high tech youth changes, and the plurality of examples of text speak leaking into schoolwork raise an issue that I might not have thought of had I not read this article from the perspective of Ungandans, who speak English as a second language.

Read her older posts, too. They’re very much on-topic for the open-door online chat I’ll be having with Anu Garg of A Word A Day on Sunday, when we’ll be discussing the effect that slang has on communication in, and comprehension of, English.

Captain of the Low Seas. "Instead of getting about on a senior scooter, for example, Mr. Hansen used a forklift, and he was famous for driving it places forklifts have no business going, including but not limited to a busted section of pier that promptly collapsed, sending him and the forklift into the water with such violence that both had to be sent off for repairs."